The 8 C’s of Self
The goal of Internal Family Systems (‘Parts Work’) is to help people access their core ‘Self’: The innate, whole essence within oneself that cannot be damaged.
However, as we become conditioned by culture, family, and the environment the psyche has a remarkable power to develop personality constructs (or parts) to avoid our past fears and recreate our past desires. When suppressed and repressed, these aspects of ourselves become the driving force of our relationship patterns with the innocent intention to keep us safe, but this often perpetuates cycles of dysfunction and ultimately prevents us from being in alignment with ‘Self.’
So how can you begin to cultivate and bring this state of presence and awareness referred to as ‘Self’? The 8 C’s are a helpful guide that describes the elements and aspects of being in the state or as ‘Self.’
1. Curiosity
When we are aligned with ‘Self,’ we approach ourselves and others with an open and non-judgmental attitude. With curiosity, we seek to understand the complexities of our internal system without judgment.
2. Compassion
Compassion invokes and cultivates a sense of kindness and empathy towards our own parts and others, acknowledging and validating each part's experiences and emotions. This is not the same thing as a strategy to change or “fix” the parts of us. Instead we welcome and accept them as they are.
3. Courage
When we are in ‘Self,’ we are encouraged to face the inner depths of the mind and subconscious. This willingness to face and explore difficult emotions, memories, and experiences within oneself, without avoidance or denial is the courage to be with discomfort.
4. Clarity
From the seat of ‘Self’ we can see and experience reality as it is. All sensations, feelings, emotions, thoughts, beliefs and energies without the labels, judgements and resistance allows us to clearly discern and recognize our internal landscape with insight and clarity.
5. Creativity
When we are in our own ‘Self’ authority, we are not expending energy towards resisting or suppressing the disowned parts of ourselves. With this spaciousness, we can realize and actualize the creativity available to us.
6. Connectedness
Being aligned with ‘Self’ is a felt sense and experience of the vastness and interconnectedness within oneself and with others. Acknowledging the interdependence of different parts, and the entire relational constellation beyond ourselves.
7. Confidence
When we access the state of ‘Self,’ we are self-assured, trusting in our own ability to navigate challenge, change and discomfort.
8. Calmness
The state of ‘Self’ is akin to a container of inner peace and stability, creating a safe internal environment where all parts feel respected, heard, and valued, promoting emotional regulation and resilience.
As we map out your internal world, the 8 C’s are the barometers of ’Self’ that you can begin to understand and relate to your parts from. Parts then become less dependent on external sources for their needs because the ‘Self’ within you is the nourishment and medicine they’ve been waiting for. In other words, you’re the one you’ve been waiting for! Onwards and inwards.
Reference: Schwartz, R. C., Sweezy, M., & ProQuest (Firm). (2020). Internal family systems therapy (Second ed.). The Guilford Press.
About Chris
Chris’s approach focuses on the ways your experiences have affected your sense of self, relationship patterns and coping strategies.
Drawing from Internal Family Systems (parts work) and narrative therapy, he will orient an approach based on your unique process and circumstances.
